betrayal and new love

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28/8/21
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136 #1
however, it is a pedantic detail that at the time of the break-up, she was pregnant and I didn't know. It is neither here nor there that I initiated the break-up of our relationship. I specifically told her over the phone never to speak or come see me. It is also irrelevant that proven the allegations of infidelity were never. I guess it is also a moot point that many feeble attempts at reconciliation were made after I learned about her pregnancy. All these came to nought. The sticking point was that I wanted Miss N. to pronounce that the unborn baby was mine, and not the guy she was allegedly seeing. She reasoned that I was being impossible. In her mind, I should have accepted responsibility - 'man up' as it were. It became clear to me that she took the break-up badly and couldn't handle my anger and suspicion. These unresolved matters of anger and desperation led her to make what to this day I consider to have been, "a terrible decision." She decided that she would raise the unborn baby on her own.

All the same, I loved Miss N. In fact, I loved her long betrayal and new love after our break-up. I told everyone who cared to listen that I would marry Miss N. one day. It never happened. Instead, life happened.

As a result of the acrimonious break-up, she gave birth to my first-born all by herself. I didn't even know the due date. I never had any proof that the child existed. Well, well, until that life changing moment on a mundane mid-day when I met my baby boy for the very first time by accident at a shopping mall. He was four years old. It was an emotional reunion. To rub salt to the open wound is that he didn't even know that I was his real father. For my part, I couldn't even acknowledge his presence. I had no right to hold my own son and kiss him. As I spoke to his Mom, he tightened his grip on the man who was holding his hand. He might have been scared of meeting a stranger. He was in the arms of another man - a man unfamiliar to me. It hurt deeply that my son had been raised by another random stranger.
 

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